Gif: Sam Woolley
Most people think of sex as a nighttime activity—but it can be even more enjoyable first thing in the morning. You were going to hit the snooze button a few times anyway, so why not do something fun instead? Here’s how to have fantastic morning sex.
Why morning sex is great
Morning sex can be a great way to start your day. Sex typically helps us feel more connected to ourselves and our partners; it relaxes us, improves our mood, and puts a spring in our step. Even if you’re usually so groggy in the morning that the thought of having sex doesn’t sound appealing, you’re still likely to feel much, much better after actually having it.
Morning sex can also be great for men who have erectile and orgasmic challenges. Most men will wake up with an erection, even those who struggle to get erections at other points of the day. (The phrase “morning wood” exists for a reason.) Many men also report that their erections feel stronger in the morning. Additionally, a lot of guys think they are able to last much longer during morning sex.
Morning sex is also awesome from a logistical standpoint. You’re hopefully waking up rested and relaxed. You’re not coming home after a long, crappy, stress-filled day. You’re already naked, or just wearing easy-to-remove pajamas. You can hop right into the shower afterwards for easy clean-up. What’s not to love?
Managing the timing
If you need to be at work at a set time, you’re probably going to want to set your alarm a few minutes earlier to give you and your partner time to get it on in the morning. I know the thought of setting your alarm even earlier might sound horrifying initially, but it can have fantastic benefits. One of the side effects of morning sex is that it forces you to slow down and get more enjoyment out of your morning, rather than leaping right out of bed and scrambling to get ready as quickly as possible.
How to initiate morning sex
Here are a few recommendations for morning sex:
- Schedule morning sex, or schedule morning quality time with each other. Even if you decide not to have sex that particular morning, you and your partner can still benefit from a few minutes of relaxed quality time with each other.
- Surprise your partner by waking them up with some sort of sexy contact. Kiss their neck, sneak your hands down the sheets, or even start performing oral. (Of course, this should only be done with partners with whom you have established consent.)
- Tell your partner that you were having a sexy dream about them. This is a great tip for people who tend to be shy about initiating sex.
- Join your partner in the shower. You can brush your teeth, get clean, and wake up a bit. Then jump back into bed to finish things off. This is a good move if you tend to feel icky in the morning (more on this below).
Choose your pacing
People usually like two specific kinds of sex in the morning – sleepy, cuddly sex, or quickies. Quickies can be great during the workweek, if you only have a few minutes to spare. Sleepy sex is awesome on the weekends, or days that you have a little extra time. Try an easy position like spooning, or try masturbating side-by-side.
Troubleshooting morning issues
If you have the tendency to get up and go in the morning, resist the urge to check your phone first thing upon waking. The second you see work emails, your libido will be gone. Say hello to your partner first, and spend a few minutes cuddling and kissing. I guarantee you’ll have a better morning, even if you don’t do anything else.
Some women experience lubrication issues in the morning, even if they feel horny. The solution here is simple—keep a bottle of lube in your bedside table for quick and easy access.
If you get self-conscious about your genitals smelling a little funky, first of all, know that your genitals are perfectly fine. But you can keep a pack of organic baby wipes in your bedside table for a fast clean-up.
The biggest complaint people have about morning sex is morning breath. But this is such an easy fix. Keep a package of breath strips in your bedside table. In just a few seconds, you’ll both have minty fresh breath. Here are some other workarounds:
- Do things that don’t require you to kiss, like oral sex or mutual masturbation.
- Forbid yourselves from kissing. This can be surprisingly hot.
- Get in positions where you can’t kiss. If you’re having intercourse, doggystyle or spooning can be great.
But honestly, morning breath really doesn’t need to be that big of a deal. Since you both have morning breath, it’s a bit easier to ignore. Once you’ve kissed for about 10 seconds, you hardly notice it anymore.
This post was originally published in 2017 and updated on October 14, 2020 to meet Lifehacker style guidelines.